Have you ever found yourself thinking that life is hard or that nothing in life comes easy. Perhaps you’ve had feelings of not being good enough, or smart enough or attractive enough. Perhaps you’ve set some goals, career goals, weight loss goals, relationship goals, but had doubts about being able to achieve them and therefore, never pursued them successfully.
These thoughts and outcomes often develop due to our core beliefs.
Core beliefs are one of the major unconscious programs that control our life. Day to day, our unconscious mind is constantly looking for evidence to support our beliefs and this can either work for us or against us. Our unconscious mind is an incredibly powerful device, however, many people are unsure on how to actually control it.
A majority of our core beliefs are formed before the age of 7. The beliefs that we form before the age of 7 tend to have the most control over our life as they are deeply unconscious.
These core beliefs are formed as we evaluate situations, events and experiences.
The interesting thing about this is as a child we lack the emotional intelligence to process situations and events for what they are, even as adults we can misunderstand events and interactions.
However, in those early years, which are also known as the “imprint years” as we make evaluations on the situations and events occurring around us, we can form some beliefs that will impact us for the rest of our life.
Negative core beliefs are one of the major causes of “blocks” in life, they can cause us to attract the same situations or people over and over again no matter how hard we try to avoid it. Core beliefs can cause us to feel stuck, they can prevent us from achieving our goals and they can create deep dissatisfaction in all areas of life.
Regardless of whether or not your childhood was pleasant or traumatic, we all form beliefs in our imprint years that have the potential to impact our life in a negative way, and I’ll give you an example.
Let’s say you’re caring for a child who is 5 years old, and that child wants an ice-cream. Now as the caregiver, you say no. and perhaps you say no for a number of reasons, perhaps you don’t want the child to spoil their appetite for dinner, perhaps its almost bedtime and you don’t want to hype them up on sugar, perhaps you simply don’t have any ice cream in the freezer.. whatever the reason, I’m sure that from your point of view it is perfectly logical. But as a 5 year old, hearing the answer NO could cause the child to form the belief that they never get what they want, or people are mean, or even a belief like nobody loves me.. as adults we know this is not the case but as a very impressionable 5 year old with minimal emotional intelligence, we can easily see how these beliefs can form.
If any one of these beliefs become core beliefs they will impact that Childs life until an event or intervention occurs to change it and here’s how.
Lets say that 5 year old child developed the core belief that I never get what I want after being denied an ice cream. The unconscious mind of the child will constantly search for evidence in the future to support this belief. As the child starts school they may struggle to make friends with other children that they want to make friends with, as they move into high school they may not get chosen for the sporting team they want to join, in adult hood they may not get the dream job that they want, the partner that they want, the house or the car or the pet that they want all because the unconscious mind is busy supporting the belief “I never get what I want”
The scary thing is, these unconscious core beliefs do control our life, and they are completely out of our awareness because they are unconscious. And many people, if they do find themselves consciously thinking “I never get what I want” they may be unaware that this is a core belief and that it is something that they can change.
In my practice I see how core beliefs control some peoples ability to achieve and maintain a healthy weight. I hear things like “I always get stuck at 80kgs” and guess what happens.. they do, even when there is no physiological reason for the body to do so. I hear things like, “I can’t lose weight” and sadly the unconscious mind of the person with this belief will help them to find evidence to support this. People who hold negative core beliefs about weight loss tend to struggle to make progress however, people who are willing to change their core beliefs and release unhelpful core beliefs find it easy to get what they want.
The process I use to assist people to change their core beliefs is easy, gentle and rapid. In fact, you can change several core beliefs in less than an hour. The process I like to use is called Time Line Therapy® which was created by Dr Tad James. I use this technique with clients during one on one programs and I also during the 7 Day NLP Intensive. The 7 Day Intensive provides you with the opportunity to experience the technique and also learn how to use this technique with others.
Changing negative core beliefs will have a profound positive effect on every aspect of your life in ways that you couldn’t imagine until experiencing it.
For me personally learning NLP and the Time Line Therapy® Limiting Belief process was life changing. It gave me a clear understanding on how my unconscious mind works and within a very short period of time I broke free from patterns in my life that were making me miserable. For years I struggled in business and couldn’t support myself financially. Within a year of learning NLP and Time Line Therapy® I left my part time job and was thriving as a business owner. For the first time in my life I was setting income goals and achieving them well within my intense time frame. I broke free from attracting relationships that were toxic, to say the least, and my self confidence and self assurance grew strong. I felt independent, resilient and for the first time in my life, empowered.
If you would like some assistance to uncover and change core beliefs that hold you back, reach out and contact me. You can CLICK HERE to schedule a free chat. You can also learn more about the 7 Day NLP Intensive HERE
If you have ever set yourself a goal but struggled to achieve it, you may be thinking.. What's the point? I never actually gets the goals I set for myself so why bother?
I know, because I used to feel this way too.
I used to set career goals, fitness goals and various life goals and would rarely get what I wanted, and if I did, you can bet the journey wasn't easy.
If you're into setting goals for yourself you may have heard of the SMART goal method.
There is a lot of information on SMART goal setting online however, what you won't see or read about online is the secret behind how you actually make your SMART goals a reality.
Throughout this article I am going to share with you the secret behind goal setting and goal GETTING.
In order to achieve your goals, we must start with the SMART format.
In my school of NLP, The word SMART is an acronym for specific, measurable, all positive language, realistic and timed.
Let's break that down.
When setting a goal it is important to be specific. I will give you an example.
If you set a goal to lose weight, and you lose 1 kilo over the next year, you would have achieved your goal. However, you may be dissatisfied with the results.
If you set a goal to lose 5 kilos in 10 weeks and to keep it off for life, THAT is a specific goal that your conscious and unconscious mind can work towards.
When setting a goal it is important for you to be able to measure your success. HOW will you know when you have achieved your goal. The inability to measure your goal will create a lack of clarity and boundaries around the intention.
All Positive Language
When writing your goal, use positive language, write the goal the way you want it. I will give you an example.
"I don't want to be unhealthy anymore" is not a goal. "I am healthy, fit, energetic and strong" is a goal expressed with positive language
When writing your goal you also want to write it like you already have it, for example, "it is now the 21st of March (date of goal completion) and I weight 85 kilos (goal weight)."
When setting goals they must be realistic and achievable.
If you desire to lose 5 kilos in 5 days you must first ask yourself, is this achievable, is this safe? If the answer is no, reevaluate your goal to ensure it is safe, achievable and realistic.
Lastly we have timed. We must set a time limit on our goals. Once again, if you have the goal to lose 5 kilos and it takes you 5 years, would you be happy with that? Set a reasonable time limit on your goals to ensure your mind knows what you are working towards.
So this is step one.
Now here is the secret.
The number one reason why people DON'T achieve their goals is because there are unconscious negative emotions, limiting beliefs and blocks.
If you set a goal for your future self and you do not remove the blocks or the unconscious disbelief around achieving your goal, you are, unfortunately, highly unlikely to achieve your goal.
Your unconscious mind is the GOAL GETTER, and if there is an unconscious belief that, "I can't lose weight", "I can't get what I want", "this is too hard", "I always fail", "I'm not worthy" etc, etc... These beliefs, on an unconscious level, will hold you back
The same goes for negative emotions. If your neurology is full of anger or sadness or guilt or whatever other negative emotions you resonate with, these emotions act as HUGE hurdles and they prevent us from getting what we want.
Negative emotions and limiting beliefs BLOCK us from seeing opportunities, they weigh us down and they cause us to keep attracting the same patterns in our life over and over again.
So how do we release negative emotions and limiting beliefs?
After studying with many colleges from all around the world, my belief is that NLP, Hypnosis and Time Line Therapy® is the most effective and efficient way to release negative emotions & limiting beliefs.
Once these blocks are cleared we check for congruency. You know that feeling of certainty you have about the belief that the sun will rise tomorrow.. This is the level of certainty we want to feel when thinking about our goals, and we keep clearing beliefs and uncertainties until we get it.
The next step is a powerful process where we drop your goal into your future time line and as we do this, all of the events between then and now will reevaluate themselves to support you in achieving your goal.
And this completes the process.
Now, there are a couple of other things to consider when you're working towards goals. The first is boundaries. It is essential to learn how to set and enforce boundaries. Every time we allow someone to violate our boundaries, we are sending a message to our unconscious mind that it is not important to us to have what we want.
I work with many people who, in the past struggled to set boundaries out of guilt, fear, anxiety and a lack of self-worth. Luckily we can resolve these things with Time Line Therapy®
The next thing to consider is, you must take action. Yes, it is very important to set your goals and to set your intention (energetically) but if your goal is of a physical nature (e.g. to lose weight, to level up your career, to find an ideal partner) you must take action to get these things.
My experience with this goal setting technique
Since I have started using this technique, I have personally created many wonderful things in my life. Things that, in the past, I never felt worthy of achieving, things I never thought I would have.
The process of clearing negative emotions and limiting beliefs was a powerful one for me and it changed everything!
This process of clearing negative emotions, limiting beliefs and dropping goals in your future time line is something I do with clients during one-on-one programs or during a Personal Breakthrough.
I also teach these techniques (and more) during the 7 Day NLP Training Intensive. Attending the 7 Day NLP Training will allow you to learn the skills to be able to do this technique with yourself and others.
You can do this as a certified coach, or casually with the people you love and care about.
It is incredibly rewarding to help others to get what they want. If you would like more information about a Personal Breakthrough or the 7 Day NLP Training, reach out and contact me, I would love to help you.
Want to learn more? Tune into the Holistic Weight Loss Podcast, Episode 18 The Secret to Goal Getting HERE
Learn more about the 7 Day NLP Training HERE